One of the things I admire most about 12-step recovery programs, like Alcoholics Anonymous, for instance, is their ability to capture concepts and messages in short pithy phrases -- sayings like, "Fake it till you make it," which, of course, means even if you don't feel you're recovered yet, act as if you are.

Another such expression is the inspiration for today's column. It's the phrase "walking the walk," which basically means that you need to act on your values rather than simply talking about them. The full phrase is usually "They're talking the talk, but not walking the walk."

These days, with the current emphasis on individual and organizational ethics and values (or the lack thereof), this phrase should have a special meaning for all of us. It is easy to espouse certain values for yourself. It is harder to espouse them and talk about them and, what is probably most difficult, to hold onto values when the consequences may be negative for you.

A common example of this principle has to do with diversity. A person who says that they value differences may well react with anger when the person who got the job instead of them is a person of a different color, gender, sexual orientation, etc. It's talking the talk, but not walking the walk. Along these lines, many of us think we are unbiased, politically correct or open-minded, and yet, when cut off by a driver on the highway, find ourselves resorting to a derogatory comment that may include the other driver's gender, color or political views.

But this isn't an issue restricted to human diversity. It's something that often happens in families, between friends, in the community and at work. For example, a parent who teaches his child about drugs and alcohol, urges moderation or abstinence, and then abuses drugs and/or alcohol him/herself is simply talking the talk. A teacher who espouses safety rules about crossing a street, looking both ways, etc., and then is seen by students stepping into the street to cross at a place other than a crosswalk is not walking the walk.

I'm not saying that, if a person does not consistently walk the walk, they do not necessarily hold the values. I believe a lot of the errors we make in this area are due to an unconscious process -- something we don't even think about. I observed this when I went to assist a large organization that had suffered a devastating fire in its town. Many of the organization's employees had lost their homes and their belongings or had been adversely affected in many other ways by the fire.

The entire organization-- up to the highest levels -- devoted itself to helping each of its 10,000 employees recover. The CEO appeared on interorganizational television urging each person to take the time they needed to work out the difficulties and not worry about work. During that time, I never talked to a manager or administrator who did not wish to help the employees. This did not, however, keep managers, supervisors or administrators from handing out assignments and saying, "This needs to be done by Friday," at the same time they were saying "take this time off."

Although they were all very legitimate requests, the routine work demands were belying the message that the first priority was for employees to take care of themselves and their families.

Talking the talk but not walking the walk actually does a double injury to the people affected by it. Not only are there the costs of whatever it is you are actually doing -- consciously or un-consciously -- there is also the sense of betrayal that comes from being told something you be-lieve in and then not seeing follow-through from the people you count on to lead with integrity.

Sally Harvey is director of the Academic and Staff Assistance Program. Her columns appear quarterly. She can be reached at (530) 752-2727 or shharvey@ucdavis.edu.